How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we’ve got our whole lives ahead of us, and you’re inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

Border Collie: Just one. And then I’ll replace any wiring that’s not up to code.

Dachshund: You know I can’t reach that stupid lamp!!

English Bulldog: Make me.

Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeeky toys in the dark.

Labrador Retriever: Oh, me, me!!!! Pleeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Huh? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeze, please, please please?!?!?!

German Shepherd: I’ll change it as soon as I’ve led these people from the dark, checked to make sure I haven’t missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

Jack Russell Terrier: I’ll just pop it in while I’m bouncing off the walls and furniture.

Old English Sheepdog: Light bulb? I’m sorry, but I don’t see a light bulb.

Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

Pointer: I see it, there it is, right there….

Greyhound: It isn’t moving, so who cares?

Australian Shepherd: First, I’ll put all the light bulbs in a little circle….

Poodle: I’ll just blow in the Border Collie’s ear and he’ll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

THE CAT’S ANSWER: “Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is: How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner and a massage?”